just jen: essays and guest posts

hamlet: discerning spirits

HORATIO

What if it tempt you toward the flood, my lord,
Or to the dreadful summit of the cliff
That beetles o'er his base into the sea,
And there assume some other horrible form,
Which might deprive your sovereignty of reason
And draw you into madness? think of it:
The very place puts toys of desperation,
Without more motive, into every brain
That looks so many fathoms to the sea
And hears it roar beneath.

via shakespeare.mit.edu

It's easy to forget, but before it is anything, Hamlet is essentially...

a ghost story.  

Think about this for a minute.  We live in uncertain times to be sure--but the Elizabethan's lived slightly more in fear of there lives.  Children were not baptized or named until they were toddlers because so relatively few of them lived beyond infancy into childhood.  The Plague took lives at regular intervals.  In fact, if you sat in a theater to watch a show, you were in a sense, defying death.  The theaters were often thought of as petrie dishes for incubating plague epidemics so in the event of an outbreak the theaters were immediately closed down.  (Periods of these closings are responsible for Bill's prolific outupt in other areas.)  

So as you took your place amongst the audience you were aware that you could actually be there on the cusp of another outbreak--every sneeze or cough would bring this to your mind.  

Add to this the political situation.  For the past 70 years or so, your country has been riddled with internal strife over religion.  Regardless of whether you were sympathetic with the Protestants or the Catholics, it is highly likely that you've heard of and perhaps seen many public acts of torture and execution over the matter of religion.  If you held Catholic sympathies--which secretly the majority of the Groundlings did, and many in the noble classes as well--you probably feel a certain horror at the prospect of your country's soul being damned for defying the Church and for eviscerating certain sanctities performed at Mass.  The very doctrines of your faith were shifting not from a legitimate theological understanding but to suit the libidinous desires of a despot King.  Some of the traditions and rituals that had provided you comfort during times of fear and sickness and death, are now no longer allowed, and dangerous to practice. 

And still you are worried about the state of your soul in all this, and the soul of your country.  

Then you sit in a seat and a story begins.  About a slain King and his Ghost, haunting the wilderness on the outside of his palace.  He appears and it is full of terror and dread.  The interesting thing about the quote above is that it reflects what Elizabethans believed about Ghosts. 

The Catholic faith believed (and still does) in the intercession of the dead with the living.  Catholics are induced to pray for the dead because Catholics believe that the interactions through the living and dead are in constant communion.  So though the occurrence is not an every day one, Catholics were prepared for the possible visitation of spirits.  There was an actual process by which one could be trained in "the discernment of spirits" .  Now is this all making you think of Zelda Rubenstein and Poltergeist? 

According to Catholic belief, It really is not far off from Speilberg's imagination in one sense, and certainly, supernatural disturbances like in Poltergeist are just an extreme example of what is happening all around in more extreme form.  Spirits were things either seen or felt that could impel the Will and threaten to enslave or kill us or drive us mad.  Think about that for a moment.  It is not so far off now from how we understand contemporary psychology, particularly addiction and certain forms of personality disorders. 

So the Ghost which appears to Hamlet in this scene, follows a chilling stage direction.  

"The Ghost beckons Hamlet." 

He beckons.  

Horatio, the role model of a good friend, warns Hamlet that he has not properly discerned this spirit and warns him of the risk. What madness could await him?  What risk to his life?  Should he not perform the proper discernment before following his impulse and his Will, which may in fact at this moment not be fully his own.  

Think of it.  Hamlet is filled with grief over the loss of a well-loved father.  Shakespeare's own father had recently died, so the language is filled with the torment and grief that comes from those haunted by loss.  And he strains to follow him.  I've posted the image above before--it is rather perfect actually. 

glee

Glee is one of those things that makes you understand how an overused word became an overused word in the first place. The word in this case is delightful. The show is funny, quick, and the singing and dancing is simply that--a delight. It is also a fascinating phenomenon to me for two reasons: the form and the first season story arc. 

I'm not sure exactly when, but at some point the American musical began to indulge in a certain self-reflexive irony. Which is to say somewhere between South Pacific and Urinetown the form began to become highly aware of itself and it's own absurdity, and actually began to mock itself within it's own context. Whether the American Musical is laughing with itself or at itself is a whole other post, but along with this self-reflexive irony, came homage to the form in multiple formats. Television shows seemed to have a semi-obligatory musical episode (see: The Drew Carey Show, Scrubs, The Simpsons, Ally McBeal) the most outstanding of which, in my opinion, was the infamous musical episode in season six of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I say it is outstanding not because I like it--which I do, I love it, like I love a nice bordeaux served at 55 degrees--but because it has actually inspired Rocky Horror Style sing-a-long late night showings and festivals all over the world.

In any case, Glee is a whole series based on the stand-out musical episode--though to be formally correct, here, Glee is not musical theater but ballad opera. Ballad opera was a popular theatrical form that used the popular music of the time to tell stories and that is exactly what Glee is--like the ballad opera format of Baz Lehrman's opulent Moulin Rouge, minus the periodicity and the, um, opulence. 

The device of the show actually justifies the most absurd aspect of musical theater, which is the random nature in which the characters burst into song. You aren't sure if everyone realizes they are singing and dancing or not. I'm not sure why this works, exactly, but it does, for some. Though some people will always find musical theater ridiculous or embarrassing, there are always those people who really get the way some emotions are so strong that words fail and only music and dance will do to get the meaning across. Glee has the perfect device for dealing with this--which is the preparation for the glee club performances which coincidentally seem to comment on the story arcs and character development (how perfect, right?) 

Which brings me to the second fascinating part of Glee--the story arcs themselves. At the heart of the story is the appealing glee club teacher Will Schuster and the budding romance between he and the guidance counselor, Emma Pillsbury. The thing is Will is married. I'm watching with fascination because I'm really wondering if a prime time television show will be able to successfully break up a marriage (if that's where they intend to go with this love triangle) and remain sympathetic. They are working hard--the wife is very unlikeable and to say that Emma Pillsbury (who is often compared to Bambi in the dialogue because of her cartoon-y doe eyes) is sympathetic is to really understate the case. She's a cross between Ann Margaret and Cindy-Lou Who. At this point, it doesn't seem that the story can resolve without Emma and Will getting together, but the problem of his marriage just seems to stick out like a sore thumb. 

So, I'm curious about how they are going to deal with this. Are Americans ready for a story that kills a marriage in order to reach a happy ending, no matter how vicious and unlikeable the wife is, and how wide-eyed and dewey her nemesis is? I'm really curious. It's a fascinating bit of meta-theatricality. Other reasons to see the show include a guest appearance by Kristen Chenoweth and um, okay--the TOP reason to see the show--Jane Lynch and Stephen Tobolowsky. The lip-synching is kind of sucky but that only seems to add to the kitch factor and there is, as I led in with, that ever-pervasive self-reflexive irony. In fact, one of the best lines of the season so far is Will Schuster's: "There is nothing ironic about show choir!"

  Ironic, yeah? My golly, it's just an ironic hall of mirrors, that, isn't it?  :)

guest post: the top 11 dumbest facebook status messages ever (or until someone writes something dumber)

Kelley Lynn is a comedian living and teaching comedy in NY and regularly tears her hair out at how stupid people are.  And yes, she means, YOU.  

So we all love Facebook. It is a nice little distraction from day to day life; or a great place to hang out while you are at a boring office or temp job, etc. Mostly; its a wonderful way to reconnect with people you honestly didn't think you'd have a chance in hell of ever hearing from again; and that is pretty neat. But for the Love of God, people, can we stop with all the stupid facebook status updates? Please? Im guessing the answer to this question would be no; simply because there will always be morons in the world and morons write stupid messages. So as long as morons exist; I shall continue to mock them endlessly. It's just what I do. And those of you who know me or have read my Wedding Planner Blog know that I do not do Top 10 Lists. I do Top 11 Lists. This is my way of honoring the great Nigel from the classic movie "This Is Spinal Tap." So I now present to you my list of THE TOP 11 DUMBEST FACEBOOK STATUS MESSAGES. As always - "these go to eleven."

(Note inside of note: In these status examples, I shall use names of random or pointless celebrities as Facebook screennames as to show that this list is not targeted at any individual person but rather to everyone on earth. )

11. EVE PLUMB is. 

Huh? Is what? Eve Plumb is what? What does this mean? Its stupid and it infuriates me. Does it mean you have nothing to say? So dont say anything. Dont write a status message at all. Why just put the word IS after your name? Is this supposed to be deep to make us all wonder what the IS is that you are referring to? Seriously, just shut up. 

10. ERIK ESTRADA is LAS VEGAS!!!! 

Really? Are ya? You ARE Las Vegas? Because I thought that maybe you were going to Las Vegas; but silly me; apparently you ARE indeed Las Vegas. And if thats the case, well then, you should perhaps be in the Guiness Book of World Records or something like that. But if youre just GOING to Las Vegas, how about just typing that youre going to Las Vegas? Why is it suddenly cool to leave out key words of sentences all over the place? Is this whats hip with the kids today? Because it really makes you sound like a moron. Equally annoying as calling yourself a place are the following: 

ERIK ESTRADA is BASKETBALL. ERIK ESTRADA is SLUMDOG MILLIONARE. ERIK ESTRADA is CAKE.

Once again - you are NOT a basketball. You are a person who is perhaps going to play some basketball. You are also not a movie or a tv show or an action verb (ERIK ESTRADA IS SLEEP.) You are not a piece of cake. Knock it off and use complete freakin sentences!!! 

9. SALLY STRUTHERS is LOST. 

Also in this category: SALLY STRUTHERS is getting LOST. SALLY STRUTHERS is lost in LOST. 

Okay. So I know this one is similar to number 10 with calling yourself a TV Show - BUT Im giving it its very own category becauase A. it annoys me that much and B. soooo many people put this as their status message every single freakin week. Seriously. We get it. You like the show LOST. You watch it weekly and you get "lost" in its complex twists and turns. You enjoy the show to the very depths of your soul. Fine. Good for you. But please, enough with the "oh Im so witty because Im using the title of the show and giving it two different meanings LOOK AT ME!" status messages. Its just pompous and really I dont care that you are all watching Lost. Go watch it , leave me alone already. Im watching HOUSE. In my house. Get it? HAHA!!! Im in my HOUSE watching HOUSE. See how I used the title there ??? See how annoying and lame that is? Yeah. Lets just stop. 

8. CAPTAIN KANGAROO is sooooo OVER IT! 

Wow. Like - oh my God, are you really? I suppose Im supposed to give a crap what it is you are OVER,right? Guess what? I don't. Don't care. Could care less. But that shouldnt bother you since you are sooooo over it and sooo over and above everything and everyone. You are probably sooo over Facebook too right? You are probably one of those people who is all of 17 and thinks they know everything while texting their pointless status msg into their Blackberry during a class which they are soooo over and then driving home in the car daddy bought them which is sooo yesterday and has a cd player in it that they are soooo over. OMG how do you live just knowing you are sooo above the rest of us? I dont know how you do it. 

7. BIGGIE SMALLS is going on Twitter,then updating facebook status, filling out a survey on MySpace, adding names to my address book in blackberry, just downloaded a song on itunes, posted a new picture of me again, and just wrote a new Blog which you should check out at imaloseranddesperatelyneedattentionfromtotalstrangers.blogspot.com .

Yeah. How annoying are these people? They have to constantly be IN THE KNOW with all the latest doo-dads and gadgets; and then feel the need to share every boring detail of it with us. They are the same ones who, when you see them in person, cant give you the time of day because they are too attached to all of their various modes of technology. And then they wonder why you stop calling to hang out. Do these people have jobs? Life responsibilities? How do they sit around all day long updating everything that they think is so important? And heres a newsflash. There are millions of blogs out there in cyberspace. Chances are, yours isnt one of the most brilliant. Maybe you can spend your entire day writing a blog, but I cant spend mine reading all 10,000 of them that I get by request per status msg. I have to pick and choose. So it better be good or dont waste my time pal! 

6. KATHIE LEE GIFFORD cannot deal with this right now!. (OR) KATHIE LEE GIFFORD was stupid to think that someone like you could ever be trusted. (OR) KATHIE LEE GIFFORD feels like she was just slapped in the face with irony. 

These all fall under the category of crypticly vague and overdramatic status messages. I cannot stand these! See - heres whats supposed to happen here. We are supposed to read the vague dramatic message, and then follow up with comments inquiring as to A. are you okay?? and B. what did you mean by what you said in that message? This is another attention seeker who has to put up the vaguest thing possible so people will ask Hey, whats this all about? Someone actually wrote the one about being slapped in the face with irony awhile back. I dont even remember who it was. I just remember wanting to slap them in the face with a brick. But I digress. 

5. BOB BARKER is the 740,000th person to plant a Bush in the bush garden and therefore Save the Rainforest and solve lifes problems all by posting a meaningless status message! You can do this too by clicking here and making a difference!

I dont know. Maybe this one shouldn't annoy me. It's more humorous than anything I guess. Just the idea that people really feel they are actually DOING something simply by clicking on a link or posting a picture of an IMAGINARY tree or animal or a red heart for Heart Awareness, etc etc etc. It makes me giggle. Its just a picture of a red heart. Nothing has happened because I posted it. Its not helping anything. You're just publically letting people know that you are a person who cares about causes, thats all. Which is a nice thing. But why not go out and DO something to support the cause instead of spending hours putting pictures of freakin smiley faces and hearts and injured animals and plants all over your page? There ya go. It's simple. Leave your computer, and walk away.... Good. Good for you.

4. MR. T is sleeping. (Or) Mr. T is zzzzzzzzzzzz. 

Not sure why this irritates me, it just does. Probably because I see it SO often on here, and because its so utterly pointless. First of all, youre NOT sleeping. You are typing. You can't do both. You're awake. And secondly, who the hell cares that youre sleeping? Its just a weird thing to write. 

3. MICHAEL PHELPS is YEEAAAAAAHHHH!!!! Holy Shyte! OMG ROTFLMAO You is crazzzyyy bro!!! LOL.

Ummm... WHAT???

2. ANDY GIBB really wants to die. (OR) ANDY GIBB is contemplating the meaning of life. (OR) ANDY GIBB just saw a rainbow in his childrens eyes. 

Gag inducing. Its Facebook people, not Hallmark. You aren't Robert Frost; so enough with all the "Deep Thoughts" on your status messages. Seriously. Status messages should be fun and lighthearted little snippets. Thats what makes them so great ! Little one liners or quotes or just fun things. Its fine to say something semi-serious but this is just too much. Sometimes after reading some of the status messages on here, I'm thinking JEEBUS! I WAS in a good mood, now I just want to off myself! How depressing! 

1. IKE TURNER just took a Shower. IKE TURNER is eating lunch. IKE TURNER just beat his wife again. IKE TURNER is driving. IKE TURNER says goodnight Im going to bed now. IKE TURNER says good morning Facebook, Im up now to start my day. IKE TURNER is at the mall. IKE TURNER enjoyed his chicken sandwich. IKE TURNER drinking pepsi. IKE TURNER had a bowel movement. IKE TURNER itched his elbow. IKE TURNER is on the F Train in the third car down, going to Brooklyn. IKE TURNER burned the meatloaf. IKE TURNER is watching American Idol, then Bones, then brushing my teeth, then going to read a book. IKE TURNER farted. IKE TURNER ran out of ink on my pen. IKE TURNER washed the dishes. IKE TURNERs nose is bleeding. IKE TURNER had his coffee. IKE TURNER got $256 back in tax refund and my social security number is xxxxxx. IKE TURNER will now post his pin number. IKE TURNER is walking east on broadway and 23rd street,come find me! IKE TURNER just came home and left the door unlocked. IKE TURNER has clammy hands. IKE TURNER pooped his pants.

Oh My Freakin God. I think you get the idea. This is the NUMBER ONE most annoying type of Status Message. Toooo much information!!! The Facebook ADDICT who updates their Status EVERY TWENTY MINUTES and tells us all every single solitary thing they are doing, where they are going to be, why, with whom, and how. What the hell? Okay people. Kindly repeat after me. YOU ARE NOT THAT IMPORTANT. Nobody cares about every little tiny detail of your stupid life. It's boring! We dont want to know. Seriously, are you this much of a pain in the ass face to face too? Do you walk in the door and start hugging your wife and saying "I'm home now. I'm walking to you now. I will now hug you. I kissed you. Update - we kissed. " Get over yourselves people. And also - you ever think that maybe its not the best idea to post THAT much detail on a public forum about where youre going to be and when? If anyone wanted to stalk you, thank you - you just told them EXACTLY where you are going to be and at precisely what time since you post updates so gorrramn much! I bet that by the time Im done typing this , those same people will have posted at LEAST 4 more updates. Its okay to just live your life. Really. You dont HAVE to post every minute of it online. Its honestly going to be okay. Everyone just relax.

Do you have your own annoying status updates?  What are they? 

gregory house

Building from Nurse Jackie and Don Draper, I thought that I'd continue on this anti-hero vein and talk a little bit about my current tv series crush, House, MD.  I'm always behind on television because, you know, I'm way too cool to watch anything as it airs on prime time, so we've been watching on DVD. Fortunately for me, my brother left Season 5 at our house and---hey Bro, if you're reading this, it's a great season SUCKAH! wait until Turkey weekend to get it back!!!-- we've become immersed in Season 5, which is the best so far. But House is like that--whatever season you are watching seems like the best season.  Despite considerable emotional difficulties brought on by immediate, unexpected fame and success, Hugh Laurie never loses a creative edge, and makes the devices of the show--like the predictable third act AHA! that both ties a and b story lines together and solves the diagnostic puzzle of the week--seem authentically fresh, no matter how many times he has to do it. 

Originally conceived of as another procedural show like CSI, the creators  quickly realized that the damaged-genius protagonist was their creative vein of gold, and season 1 evolved from the individual puzzles he solves to relationships and character development.  House is a maverick, an unparalleled diagnostic genius, a musician of substantial ability, and a practical joker--he is also mean spirited, lacking in empathy, self-absorbed, and a pill-popping drug addict, as gifted in inflicting pain on those he purportedly cares about as he is in manipulating a differential.  

At first the supporting characters are wooden devices, there to prop up House--but by Season 2, they've each become their own enigma, and the writers undress them slowly, confidently.  One character in particular had the potential to be cloyingly inauthentic, the necessary sidekick Dr. James Wilson. House, a narcissist who doesn't feel that communication is particularly essential, and asks no permission before acting makes Wilson a necessary device (see Don Draper and The Nick Caraway Effect) as he probes in order that we may find out what  the impenetrable doctor might be thinking or feeling.  Gregory House is modeled on Sherlock Holmes, of course--the name is a play on Holmes, and Robert Sean Leonard's endearing Dr. Wilson is Laurie's Watson.  Wilson is the key to knowing House, and finding him sympathetic in anyway. It would be easy to forget the difficultly in believing that a man like Wilson would be such a loyal and dutiful friend to someone as frustrating and pain inflicting as House--but even that is a secret eventually laid bare and the answer is satisfyingly believable, and extends Wilson from  two dimensions to three and possible four.  

There is a lot of careful planting and sowing in Seasons 1-3,  and seasons 4 and 5 are harvest time; I give the writers the Joss Whedon Award for unanticipated and gut wrenching character story twists--the kind that almost leave you angry that the creators manipulated you into something akin to authentic grief. 

Expert storytelling aside, what is so fascinating about House is not only why the characters in the series put up with him but why we do.  Shore, the creator of the character who he claims was inspired by Holmes and Dr. Perry Cox from Scrubs, was really concerned that, in the wrong hands, House would be just hateful.  And Laurie succeeded in creating a character that is horrid, reprehensible and self-indulgent.  The question is, why do we care about Laurie's House?  Why do we put up with a character who is a selfish, manipulative, sabotaging, misanthropic, atheist, who not only refuses to have faith in humanity, love, and God but goes to great length to destroy such belief in others?  

The writers give us the means through the characters who love him--the more sympathetic the characters around him become, the more we love the great big boil of a foil in their midst, and the writing provides conflict in their desire to work with House and to understand the man behind the virtuosic abilities.  And Hugh Laurie's authentic talent for music is also a glimpse into the man behind the Vicodin--his love of music in listening and performance, makes you believe that he does in fact have a soul, and one worth saving, too.  There is one episode in particular where this is crystal clear--House fails to attend an event in support of a close friend, and stays, hermetically sealed, in his man-pad. Inter-cutting scenes of the event with his impassioned improvisation on the gorgeous, jet black baby grand Yamaha that sits at the center of his cave, it is not only the feeling in the performance but the choices in his improvisation that read.  His improvisation evolves from something typically House-y-blues-y, to something atypically traditional, foreign, and, indeed, something religious.  Even before it morphs back into a funky mixolydian mode, it is undeniable what we have just heard: House is playing for his friend, sending a spirit that desires to be there and participate in the joy of loving another, even as his deeply flawed personality and scarred, crippled body refuse to attend in a deliberate and despicable adhedonia (a pathological inability to experience pleasure--a diagnosis, that actually emerges in two patients in Season 5).  

Hugh Laurie is an unknown to most Americans, though to those who are fans of Rowan Atkinson's outrageously funny British comedy series Blackadder, he is a lovable and familiar face.  But even those of us who know his considerable comedic gifts, experienced something of a revelation in his creation of Gregory House.  He is uncanny; he portrays the inner contradiction of a character who spews a hateful and scientific materialist view on the world, yet somewhere, unspoken, and perhaps even sub-cognitive--we believe that the force with which he launches that black-pit world view emanates from a dark and desperate desire for it to be proven false.  

There is an over-riding arc in his character--House is a man who solves riddles in a search for a God he can't bring himself to believe exists.  He continually performs metaphysical experiments using patients to prove to the world and himself that things like love, God, and belief, are nothing more than irrational aberrations, biochemically produced, and that the afterlife is a fairy tale we tell ourselves when we are afraid of the sleep-dark of death.  Laurie makes us believe that his determination in proving these things is not that he doesn't believe that they are true.  Rationally, he is convinced.  But there is an emotion in House, a sort of auto-erotic sadomasochism, where he continually needs to prove it to himself, in order to feel the pain of realizing it isn't true.  He is a spiritual self-mutilator.  

Here is where contemporary television writers have found a mode in which to keep a pluralistic American audience composed of various layers of belief and non-belief, atheism, and theism, hooked in. They create a God through the desire for Him--sometimes, that manifests as a painful and ardent desire for a God who doesn't exist.  Even the most ardent atheist, must admit that they have at least, once, perhaps when they were children even, wished there was a God, even if they can't quite believe there is one.  Who can deny the desire for immortality?  For eternal happiness? 

Laurie's words and performed attitudes would satisfy the most militant scientific atheist audience member.  But his eyes, his pain,--and his music--leave a yawning question that would satisfy the most convicted mystic.  

Either way, the space for God and Love, with a capital L, is there, either in Faith or in the presence of His keenly felt absence.  The shows has it's skeptical atheist cake--and the spiritual romantic can eat it, too.